It’s been a week filled with mixed emotions for me following from my first therapy appointment.
I’ve been seeing various professionals for three – four years now. You’d think that by now that it would be of a second nature to not be affected by talking about my issues. That’s not the case.
I left the appointment feeling like I’d just had an out of body experience. My whole body was left tingling and I was feeling quite nauseous. It took a couple of days to get over that. I have been vulnerable to the bad stuff and still feel weak emotionally.
It’s just the package that comes with seeing a specialist. It’s always worse before it gets better.
You might remember my countdown to editing my novel, Pandora’s Kiss. I made a start on Wednesday (originally I’d planned to start on the 1st of Feb but with me needing downtime to recover I decided to postpone it). I’ve binned just over three hundred words so far and minimised my connective words (my, to, a), and so on. I’m using a text to speech engine to help me pick up on errors and it’s working like a treat. If you’re in the middle of editing or just about to start you might want to download one onto your PC.
It’s going to be a slow process as I want to make sure I catch everything that I can. As someone who has spent the last few years rewriting scenes and characters it’s a strange thing to be editing. I’m on a learning journey and while I am finding it challenging I’m also finding it enthralling.
My weakness as a writer, I feel, is describing internal emotions. My psychologist asked me to describe what happened inside my body and I couldn’t really describe it. I’ve always had that difficulty. While I know how I feel I don’t know how to tell that to others. That’ll get brushed up on during the process of editing.
I’m gearing up for another session of therapy on Monday. I will keep you all posted.
Hope you have a great week!
Until next time,
With thanks to Joanna Kosinska for the image via Unsplash.com.