The First Step to A Long Journey

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Hi guys!

Only two days to go until I start editing Pandora’s Kiss!

This week has been less stressful compared to last week. Apart from a minor family blip things have gone pretty smoothly.

My younger brother turned 10 last Tuesday and me and my husband went to celebrate at with his father, stepmum, aunt, uncle and his cousins. He had a Star Wars cake which he tried to have two slices of. A boy of my own heart. Not that he got away with it.

This week has offered up a gateway to recovery. I have finally got a date for therapy after waiting just over a year to start. This has brought up all sorts of emotions from relief to anxiety. I know it’s normal to be anxious about sharing issues with a complete stranger, but it’s still a feeling that I find hard to deal with.

I’ve been thinking about my goals concerning what I’d like to achieve in therapy. I have a huge issue with being social with others. As a writer needs solitary to write that may come as no surprise, but it’s become harder to be around people. I find that I can’t think of things to say and so I become an observer rather than be included.

Another huge issue is attachment. I was treated very poorly by my mother who has always rated men over me. I was subject to abuse by her and one of the guys she fell in love with. It’s due to this that I get attached very easily to others, particularly women because of missing out on that basic as a child.

I’m hoping that at the end of it I will be able to be a lot more relaxed and talkative in social situations and that I won’t get attached as easily or give all of myself in relationships that don’t benefit me.

I will keep you posted on my progress as well as my editing.

Until next week,

Blaze

With thanks to Julia Caesar for the image via Unsplash.com

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